Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Dancing with the Stars

Joey Lawrence looks like a gay cue ball. I’m not sure you can have a gay inanimate object but if a cue ball could be gay it would look like Joey Lawrence. I challenge anyone to go to IMDB and confess they have seen anything he has done in the last 5 years…..cmon…I dare ya.

I don’t know who Sara and Tony are but Tony should shut up about his fans. I don’t think he has any fans.

Mario Lopez is done kicking Zach’s ass and he’s kicking the very same. He appears to be the man of this season and apparently he really is screwing his dance-mate. FINALLY, one of the contestants is admitting to and acknowledging that they are sleeping together…..at least I think that’s just what happened. I just wish Jesse would be in the competition based on her hit performance in Showgirls. With all that classic dancing she seems RIPE for the show.
Judge’s comments: The old guy just said he was the opposite of Joey….ummm because he’s straight and believable that he enjoys dancing with a woman? The gay judge (you know the one, its really obvious) just said something about throbbing and hammering. Pretty sure he was thinking of Slater hammering it home.

Good GOD….the hits keep coming….its Slater’s birthday and some other queer dancer just brought him some giant cake while he stood there with no knife and nothing possible to do with the tower of batter and icing. What was he supposed to do with that??? Why not just bring him a piece to bite into?

How and why is Jerry Springer still on here? Oh god, they just showed Jerry with no shirt……not good. Oh god….he’s dancing….he has two moraccos and is just flailing them around…..just played air drums on the feather in her ass of her costume….just played air drums on her belly (sort of)…..he’s NOT dancing in ANY sense of the word yet the crowd is going crazy. Last year’s old idiot, George Hamilton, was at least semi-charming and MUCH better than this.
Judge’s Comments: chick says he made her laugh…of course…he’s an idiot. Old guy isn’t even understandable in that dumb British accent.

Louie and the girl from high school musical just danced…..the gay judge is crazy describing the dance…I can’t even put it into words… I have NO idea what he was saying, he’s a lunatic.

Emmitt is doing the Samba (no idea how to spell it, nor do I care). Apparently the only issue in doing the Samba is making sure you are properly adjusted by your chiropractor. His partner Cheryl went from professional singer/dancer Drew Lachey to a football klutz. I’m still waiting for the story to break that Cheryl and Drew are an item. It’s gonna happen…..TRUST ME.

The gay judge is completely incomprehensible. I didn’t understand him during ANY review.


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