A night out.....
By myself of course......Perhaps I haven't been clear but I really don't like many people....no need for them really. People are generally just interested in themselves. I'm just interested in sex, booze, sports, gambling and of course.....mocking buffoons so I have little need to hang out with people who want to discuss world issues, politics, themselves, their personal issues or anything other than the 5 things I want to discuss. This eliminates a LARGE portion of normal people that I simply can't associate with therefore I spend ALOT of time alone.
That all said....I was out one night for happy hour...by myself and had quite a delightful time much to the expense of those around me. The bartender (Skip) was a very cool guy and I liked him....he sang to himself to the classic rock disc playing...was happy go lucky and poured good drinks.
So this was Tuesday night....happy hour special night....lots of regulars. This one dude comes in...he was clearly a loser......comes in every Tuesday....Skip works every tuesday so he should know him. Skip goes "hey buddy...what can I get you"....Loser says "ah skip, same as always".....Skip goes "hmmm, yeah...what's that again....hey, whats your name again anyway". Loser was SOOOO pissed...."Skip, do we have to go through this again? I'm 'such & such', I order a 'such & such' every tuesday when I come in". Skip says "yeah....I thought you looked familiar....sorry pal". Loser is in there EVERY week and Skip thinks he looks familiar. I'm already chuckling at this point.
Then this group comes in......7 people. Two youngish looking girls....early-mid 20s, not hot, not ugly...just girls......one woman in her 40s....uninteresting as well... a prego chick......then two Fat head guys.....big fat heads....big lips, protruding foreheads, bushy eyebrows, look like cavemen...totally look like cavemen. So the 2 young girls, the prego, the 40s lady and the cavemen all look like they just got off work at some carpet store AND THEN there is this guy in a suit looking like he walked off Wall Street...he was in his 40s, well dressed, bald and looked established. Couldn't figure this group out for the life of me. 6 People from the carpet store and the I-Banker. Who knows.
3 more people on the other side of the bar.....regulars...Skip knew them...."you want the regular guys or you need menus???"...."Ahhh, give us menus". I'm already thinking....why do those buffoons want menus.....1st) they know every damn thing on the menu, 2nd) they're gonna order the same shit they do every week......I'm betting myself a shot on this.....guess what....after 15 mins of looking at the menus I owed myself a shot when I heard...."hey skip, just put in our regular order.....2 wings and 2 sliders".
Why would I possibly need to go out with anyone else when I can sit and amuse myself at the expense of others just fine by myself??? Kitty is coming back for a visit this week and she gets it so maybe we'll do some mocking together.
That all said....I was out one night for happy hour...by myself and had quite a delightful time much to the expense of those around me. The bartender (Skip) was a very cool guy and I liked him....he sang to himself to the classic rock disc playing...was happy go lucky and poured good drinks.
So this was Tuesday night....happy hour special night....lots of regulars. This one dude comes in...he was clearly a loser......comes in every Tuesday....Skip works every tuesday so he should know him. Skip goes "hey buddy...what can I get you"....Loser says "ah skip, same as always".....Skip goes "hmmm, yeah...what's that again....hey, whats your name again anyway". Loser was SOOOO pissed...."Skip, do we have to go through this again? I'm 'such & such', I order a 'such & such' every tuesday when I come in". Skip says "yeah....I thought you looked familiar....sorry pal". Loser is in there EVERY week and Skip thinks he looks familiar. I'm already chuckling at this point.
Then this group comes in......7 people. Two youngish looking girls....early-mid 20s, not hot, not ugly...just girls......one woman in her 40s....uninteresting as well... a prego chick......then two Fat head guys.....big fat heads....big lips, protruding foreheads, bushy eyebrows, look like cavemen...totally look like cavemen. So the 2 young girls, the prego, the 40s lady and the cavemen all look like they just got off work at some carpet store AND THEN there is this guy in a suit looking like he walked off Wall Street...he was in his 40s, well dressed, bald and looked established. Couldn't figure this group out for the life of me. 6 People from the carpet store and the I-Banker. Who knows.
3 more people on the other side of the bar.....regulars...Skip knew them...."you want the regular guys or you need menus???"...."Ahhh, give us menus". I'm already thinking....why do those buffoons want menus.....1st) they know every damn thing on the menu, 2nd) they're gonna order the same shit they do every week......I'm betting myself a shot on this.....guess what....after 15 mins of looking at the menus I owed myself a shot when I heard...."hey skip, just put in our regular order.....2 wings and 2 sliders".
Why would I possibly need to go out with anyone else when I can sit and amuse myself at the expense of others just fine by myself??? Kitty is coming back for a visit this week and she gets it so maybe we'll do some mocking together.
posted by The Buffoonery at 9:54 PM
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